Work Update....

Well, I knew going back full time would be an adjustment for all of us, but I had no idea how much it would effect me. The first day was the longest day.... All I could do was talk about my girls so I did not feel so far away from them. Slowly but surely, I made it through week one. It felt like that week lastest a year!!!! It also seemed to be affecting the girls, Kaiya was scared when I even left the room and was sobbing at bed time (she never does that) Cass was all of a sudden waking up 2 to 3 times a night and fighting going back to sleep. I was trying so hard not e stressed around them - but children are so smart and pick that up.

Week 2 rolled around and my body decided to get into the stress equation. I normally do have some sort of physical reaction to stress... headaches, neck pain, stomache issues... well, Monday night of week 2 it all came at the same time. I was really not sure if I was sick or .... homesick. Well - I still dont know the answer to that... although I do know I had an ovarian cycst rupture Sunday.... what fun:) I thought I was in labor again!!!!! ANYWAY.... when I was at Sequent, I learned in a short time how driven the environment was, everyone there stayed late, got there early and even worked on weekends - frequently. My only thought at 5 was not what I could do for the company but was how fast can I get on the highway to get home. I tried to get into the swing of things.... but my drive was not there. I realized how much being a Mom had changed me, in ways I had not thought of. I used to work very hard at my job, and feel very fufilled by my accomplishments. I was very driven and committed - now all of that passion is not for work anymore - it is for Cassie and Kaiya and I dont want to miss how little they are and all the new and amazing things they do everyday. I will look for another job, but it will need to be closer to home as well as much more family friendly.

In short - I am currently a full time stay at home Mom. I feel like a bit of a quitter.... but then I see how important I am to my girls and know I did the right thing.

Ok..... done rambling.